I loved this headline and enjoyed the article...

Sex Smells from FoxNews (yes, I frequent that site AND channel).

My favorite quote:

Men have a less discriminating nose: every smell boosted sexual arousal. Perfumes increased arousal by a mere 3 percent, cheese pizza by 5 percent, and a combination of lavender and pumpkin pie by 40 percent.

Received via email.

1. Open a new file in your computer.

2. Name it "George W. Bush"

I'm sure I won't be awake at midnight to post this, so gotta get it in tonight before I pass out.

Some funny quotes from George Burns to make you laugh :)

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.

By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.

I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.

From BBC News:

Sudan man forced to 'marry' goat

A Sudanese man has been forced to take a goat as his "wife", after he was caught having sex with the animal.

The goat's owner, Mr Alifi, said he surprised the man with his goat and took him to a council of elders.

They ordered the man, Mr Tombe, to pay a dowry of 15,000 Sudanese dinars ($50) to Mr Alifi.

Are you unhappily married ever after?

I think they should be asking if you are "happily divorced" instead of "unhappily married."

Well, for those couples who are undergoing the often-painful process of divorce, here a one small way to bury your past: A tiny "coffin" to lay to rest your now-useless wedding rings.

If by chance you should end up with a monster in your house, this little girl has some pretty good advice on what to do with it. Enjoy!

Defense Attorney:
Will you please state your age?

Little Old Lady:
I am 86 years old.

Defense Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?

From an email:

So here I am at work listening to the whining of single bitches in my office piss and moan about not being able to find a nice single guy.

Off Topic Note: Every year this Valentines thing gets a little worse - it used to be you could get away with a box of chocolates, some flowers - now it's like Christmas.

Having been a nice guy and now having been hooked up for a while, Honey, I have a few words for you - WAKE THE FUCK UP!